Note: this is the latest text for my About page.
When it comes to things I do, I write fiction and am a musician and beginning composer, among other things.
My general interests in no particular order are:
- myth and folklore;
- writing and storytelling;
- health and medicine (both physical and mental);
- thinking, organizing information, and making connections between ideas.
I avoid taking on new hobbies whenever possible.
The limit, you see, is time and energy. I’ve been an English major, pre-med with emphasis on neurobiology, a middle school science teacher, a programmer. They’re all interests of mine that I would pursue if only I had the time. But there are (at minimum) two true things about the world and life in it:
* We have to make decisions
* Life and time will move on whether we make decisions or not
I can either float along, paralyzed with indecision and a fear of deciding, thus accepting by default whatever comes my way and kicks down the door, or I can make the effort to pursue something more. Greatness and happiness are not passive affairs.
In the past, I wondered and worried about making the “right” decision, but now that I’m on the other side of about ten years of worry, I don’t think there’s a right decision at all. Instead, what I’m left with is the responsibility to choose what I feel is best for me right now.
I’m working on accepting that I’m not limited to doing one thing ad nauseum for the rest of my life. Not only is the workplace changing and people are turning over through companies and careers at an ever-increasing pace, but I’ve found that the “one thing” approach isn’t a fit for my personality. The core of this new idea is that I can devote time to a passion, and then move on to another passion, without feeling like I can’t commit to anything or have failed or “wasn’t serious”. Or I can work on two or more things simultaneously, and, given enough work, reach a level of happiness in each.
In this new world of mine, there is no more guilt about not sticking with something or “killing my darlings”, said darlings being all those projects I want to do, things I want to learn, and careers I want to pursue that will suffer when my attention turns elsewhere. Moving in a new direction does not mean I don’t care about what has come before or that I can never return to it. After all, each “right thing” felt like the right one at the time, and each contributes to “me” as a whole and hopefully helps me become a better person along the way.
When I started this blog, I intended on writing a new “about” page for each new year–and fell short of my goal in spectacular fashion. This update is another attempt to start a habit that I tried to form a few years ago.
When I wrote my update in 2010, I was set in a creative space (as my many updates about writing will attest). 2012 will be a year of change and new directions. I’m still working on what that “right for me right now” decision will be and where it will take me.